How to deal with your traumatic past
In this past, I want to go over three tips to deal with your traumatic past experiences during your manifestation journey.
Manifestation, to put it simply, consists of your dominant thought patterns. As long as you have been mentally consistently: think in your favor regularly, and think as if all your desires have already been achieved…keep maintaining the mental state of having all your desires already, and tell yourself you always manifest instantly, effortlessly, you can find out the outside world reflects on the abundance of your beautiful, confident inner world;). It helps a lot when you have a high self-concept, including the genuine belief in your operant power to create your own reality. My next blog post will be about what self-concept is, and some effective ways to improve your self-concept. So, stay tuned for the new posts!
Yes, we can manifest for anything. The power of our mind is limitless. But no matter what, remember to follow your own ethical codes, ok? Manifest to bring love, positivity, abundance to you and people you care about deeply. Don’t use manifestation as an excuse to be shitty to other people (e.g. purposely wish bad things happen to certain people so you can get the money you desire).
And speaking of manifestations, remember to fight for racially, economically, and nationally oppressed people’s liberation forever and as always. The world we live in has so many beautiful, cute, and exciting things in. But, systemic oppressions such as capitalism, imperialism, sexism, racism, homophobia, and transphobia have created barriers that prevent marginalized people from reaching their full potentials. One example: the wealth of France has been and continues to be earned unfairly because former French colonies, with the majority are African countries, have to pay a large amount of so-called “colonial tax” to France annually. In other words, a large amount of wealth of France is earned through the exploitation of people of color from global south nations. Economic sanctions from the Western imperialist power leads to actual economic, physical, and psychological harms to citizens from sanctioned, global south countries. After we successfully manifested amazing things for ourselves and our loved ones, don’t forget about the oppressed people in our own community and all over the world. Keep centering and sharing stories, go fund me campaigns, and writings from people from Palestine, Congo, and Sudan. We can do so much through donating money to PayPal accounts/ go fund me campaigns from struggling people; sharing and centering posts from people in need through our social media accounts; bringing awareness to social justice related issues by having regular, important conversations with our siblings, partners, friends, biological and/or chosen family; keep affirming and visualizing a better future for working-class, queer folks, and women. One of my affirmations is: I have the limitless power to bring love, health, prosperity to me and my loved ones. I also use my power for good, and defend and shelter those who need help. Power has been and will continue to use for good;).
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In today’s post, I will talk about three ways to approach our traumatic past. Whatever way you use depends on the specific situation you are in.
Ideally, in most cases, when we manifest, the past does not matter. Our past traumatic experiences (e.g., was physically, emotionally, or even sexually abused by ex-partners; family were verbally abusive to us in the past because they were also dealing with their own insecurities and traumas; experienced school bullying; faced employment, housing, and education-related discrimination due to our class and/or queer identity) do not define our present and the future. We fight for a better future, we affirm, and think like we are already living in the perfect world! With a high self-concept, and successfully reprogramed subconscious mind that keeps us thinking confidently consistently, we can achieve so much more! But for those ones who still doubt their own ability to revise, design, and change their own life, those ones who are too traumatized by their past so their minds keep going back and forth between their ideal world and the temporally not-so-good physical world they are living in, it’s not helpful to simply tell them: just affirm and persist in the new story no matter what. What if they cannot let go the old stories? I want to validate their experiences, give them a consensual hug, and let them know: It’s ok. Your feelings and experiences are totally valid. You don’t have to do whatever others insist you doing. There are ways to deal with your traumatic past.
This post is for those ones who cannot let go their traumatic past easily.
After all, I consider myself a trauma-informed, client-centered manifestation coach, not someone who simply tells all people: manifestation looks and works the same for everyone.
Three ways to deal with the past:
(1): Change your perspective by looking at a past event through new, refreshing eyes.
From your memory, your father was always verbally mean to you and your mother when you were young. Almost every night he was back home from work, he acted angrily, which made you feel stressful. Because of this, you learned to avoid your father, and your relationship with him hasn't been good until today. So, what do you do?
You can talk to your mum and other family members about your father’s past behaviors from a certain period of time. Examine the past more carefully, and ask your subconscious mind every night before you go to sleep: dear subconscious mind, please show me the answers to my father’s past verbally abusive behaviors towards me. Tell me why he was that way…Thank you for your insights and guidance as usual. Perhaps 5 days or a week after your daily night conversations with your subconscious mind, you find the answer.
Or perhaps, after some phone calls with your mum, sister, and uncle, you realize that from your age of 5-10, your father went through a long period of financial insecurity. He worried about how to provide for his whole family all the time and changed one job to another in every 6-8 months. It was a dark period of his, so, he was quite emotionally unstable at that time. Through deep conversations with different people, you also found out that: despite the financial insecurity he went through a that time, he still tried to be a good father as much as he could. He took you and your sister to a family trip for the New Year’s Eve at a nearby city. You and your sister went to several museums during that trip. It looked like a regular trip for your young self, but he actually saved money for 2 months (e.g., only ate two meals daily) to afford that trip. So, your father has always loved you…It was just due to a difficult time, his love for you was mixed with a high sense of anger for several years.
With the new information presented to you, you can affirm healing this way: Dear father, I understand the reasons of your past anger towards me. It did not feel good, but now I know you are always a good, loving father. I am grateful you are my father now. I still love you…
You repeat the affirmations several times each day.
You can even write an angry letter to your father, and burn the whole letter! When your mood improves, you write a new letter to your father full of sincerity, honesty, and compassion at another day. And, it’s up to you as for whether you want to send the new letter with refreshing perspectives to your father or not. Maybe you don’t want to send it yet. Or perhaps, you want to send it a few days before his birthday this year. ;).
(2): Use humor and the revision methods to review your past.
You were bullied by a bunch of boys for three years in each PE class in middle school? You affirm: Hey! Success is the best revenge! I’m living my best life in every second now. Haters and bullies cannot stop my power to shine!
Or, you use humor to revise the past this way: Remember in middle school I was made fun of by Jack and his gang for three years? Ha. That’s nothing. They only bullied me because they were threatened by my excellent academic records and good look;). Really, it’s nothing. Who cares what young lost boys think and behave;).
In this case, you talk to yourself humorously. Humor/laughters is a strong power to overcome mental blocks. Make your inner dialogues fun! Meanwhile, when you say “their bullies are nothing, because they are threatened by me, and no one cares what they think and/or do”, you are purposely revising the past traumatic experiences by claiming that their behaviors are really nothing for you now, which is so different from what you believed when you experienced their bad behaviors when you were much younger. Another example: You had a major brain surgery two weeks ago, and are on a successful recovery path, but you want to make your recovery as quickly as possible. You can keep telling yourself something like: Ha! I am always so healthy. It’s amazing how healthy I am. What’s a brain surgery? I don’t know what it is. My brain is big, bright, unique, and healthy as always.
Humor combined with the revision method can be quite powerful. They are effective for some people who need to deal with past events that are somewhat traumatic, but not extremely traumatic…..…I sometimes use them, but not always. You have to figure out whether this method works~
(3): For those ones who have been through extremely traumatic events in the past (e.g. : be victims of sexual assaults; be abused by a partner or close family members for years; was homeless for a while as a poor queer person and had no choices but to do survival work in the deeply exploitative sex trade, etc ), and find the methods of simply changing your perspectives & using humor and revision do not work, then the method of shadow work is for you…
How to do shadow work? There’s no right answer, because each person’s situation is unique in its own way. Breath work; listen to soft, gentle music while thinking and/or verbally talking about your affirmations each night; find a group of supportive people who have been through similar things as you either through an online community or and/or irl support group, and share your feelings & healing journey with them on a regular basis; do longterm therapy sessions with a affordable, caring, trauma-informed, and survivor-centered licensed therapist and/or an experienced manifestation coach who understands your needs and wants, and offers practical advice to you regularly; write your stories and growth on a journal; go out to run and attend fun shows once in a while; write down all your strengths/positive traits and read them often, etc. Through longterm, caring shadow work that helps you to carefully examine you past traumas and guide you effective, personal customized ways to deal with your own traumas, you reflect, learn, and grow, and gradually become a more confident person.
Is shadow work really necessary to manifest? Not really. But once again, it depends on the specific situation that each person is in! For some, it’s easy for them to maintain the mental state of having everything, be consistent, and manifested successfully. But for those ones who have been through extremely traumatic events from the past with a low self-esteem, it can be a different story. We don’t have to identify every single trigger of us through shadow work, but, it still helps to identity some of the main triggers….and ways to handle them effectively and healthy. And I understand everyone’s end goal for manifestation is different: some people simply want to get what they want easily, be done, and move on to manifest other things; but for some others, me included, other than manifesting amazing life for myself and my loved ones, use my power for good, I also consider continued healing and personal growth important parts of my manifestation life. Perhaps you are the same;)?
I can talk more about shadow work, but this post is already long enough….;). If you want to know more about shadow work in manifestation, and want to do a free consultation, or work with me officially, just email me. My email address: MissKittenKitten@pm.me
Additionally, I firmly believe for all survivors, other than doing necessary shadow work for manifestations and/or personal growth, all of you deserve justice in whatever way that you need! I see you, care about you, and want the best for you!
Remember, you are powerful, and will never ever determined by your past traumas.
Good luck out there!